He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
