Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Randomize
