i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
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