"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
