Non-Jews are for practice
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
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