in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
Randomize