can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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