So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
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