I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Randomize
