My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
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