so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
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