you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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