You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize
