But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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