Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Bang-toberfest begins!!
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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