he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
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