Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
