PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
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