Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
