we're blogging at a bar
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
Randomize
