theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Randomize