two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Randomize
