So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
Randomize