So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
Randomize
