My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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