what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize