it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize
