i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
