seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
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