i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize