I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
Randomize
