Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
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