standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Randomize
