pedialite and red bull = repair kit
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
