He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Alive.
So much puke
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
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