I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
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