do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize