dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize
