i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
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