There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
You did what with his pubic hair?
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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