What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
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