I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
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