I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
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