If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
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