he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Randomize
