Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
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