Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
Randomize
