i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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