So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
Randomize
