Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Randomize
