Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
