Christians are straight up FREAKS
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize