take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
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