just come out here and I will go home with you...
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
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